A few things
"There are a few things PKs have to deal with that most kids don't"
This is true.
I've known several PKs, (pastor's kids) but to write this article, I went to the internet and let them speak to me.
I've come across a few reasons for PKs leaving the church. These are in no particular order.
.
1) PKs are expected to be morally superior to other children, even the kids of the people scrutinizing them.
PKs often have eyes from every part of town scrutinizing them. Even teachers and coaches expect more of them.
.
2) Just as pastor's wives are often expected to play the piano and lead the women, PKs are often expected to contribute more to the church
than other kids their age. PKs may be expected to fill in teaching Sunday school, work the sound board, clear tables after potluck, etc.
Being a PK is kind of like being a sharecropper's kid. They carry a part of the load to make the church succeed, sometimes beyond
what many lay-adults in the church do. As a result, PKs sometimes feel bitter toward the workload expected of a pastoral family.
And what should the 'pastoral family workload' be? Has this ever been openly discussed with pastoral candidates by that deacon board?
.
3) This workload often emotionally separates PKs from their parents, because the pastor or spouse is gone so often.
Some PKs resent church for this absence.
For some PKs, the church family is like a wicked stepmother and the PK is the Cinderella, or Cinderfella.
.
4) Some PKs are completely qualified to train for the ministry when they get older,
but don't want to see their children treated the way they were treated.
.
5) PKs are often cornered for spiritual advice that they don't feel qualified to give.
Some people think that a 16-year-old PK can save a marriage.
.
6) PKs are often resented by other kids and parents for getting the leads in plays, musical solos, etc. Yet, other church members really are cool,
and have kind intentions, and simply try to adopt every PK as one of their own grandkids. Some church folks really are like extended family.
.
7) Speaking of which, it is possible for a young PK to be utterly spoiled by the church, then become resentful when they are expected to become
part of the church's labor force once reaching a certain age. Some PKs reject the notion of serving.
.
8) Some denominations have pastoral assignments, chosen by leaders upstream. The pastors have no say where they will go,
so certainly, the kids have no say. PKs and pastor's wives can get a 'detachment disorder' and find it difficult to be supportive
to the congregation they are sent to serve. PKs are like military dependents in this case.
.
9) Some PKs live in a glass bowl, with dad using their kids as examples for in sermons.
PKs should be able to give or withhold consent on this, without penalty.
.
10) Being a PK can scare off potential suitors.
.
11) One website spoke of the PK frustration of having to keep silent on certain issues, because personal opinions might rock the church-boat.
Are some people afraid the Ark might sink?
.
12) Movie makers sometimes target PKs as psychopathic killers or streetwalkers. That's discouraging.
I'm a carpenter, maintenance man, handyman, and too often, this is the trade of child-abductors, and female-abusers, so I understand.
.
13) Some PKs see a difference between the pulpit and the hearth. What is taught in church isn't always lived at home.
And a young adult can't be forced to attend church when they sense a double standard.
.
14) Some PKs escape church because... their church really is a religious cult. These young adults need to rethink who God really is.
.
15) Some leave the church to dive full-face into sin. All kinds of church kids leave to do sex sins, and drug sins and theft sins.
Including PKs and MKs.